All characters belong to Aaron Sorkin, John Wells Productions, Warner Bros., & NBC. Standard disclaimers apply. Please send feedback. In The Dark Violet
He has his trivia, his facts, his minutiae that the world is made of. He'd stay up all night learning about bookbinding, or the political history of Micronesia. That's not my way. Sometimes when I can't sleep, I read the driest thing there is -- the dictionary. Later, I lie in the dark, and bits of it run through my head.
"Form."
Function: Noun.
Etymology: Middle English 'forme', from Old French, from Latin 'forma' form, beauty.
1. The shape and structure of something as distinguished from its material.
It's image versus reality. The form is the lady who smiles, who speaks, whom they name helicopters after. Form is the gentleman who governs, who guides, whom the world looks to. Form follows function; we play the parts we are supposed to play. That's our shape and structure, now.
Then there's the essential nature of things. The material is a man and a woman lying here not sleeping, not satisfied, barely speaking. The other shoe has dropped and we're waiting for the echoes.
"Form."
Function: Verb.
Date: Thirteenth century.
1. To give a particular shape to: shape or mold into a certain state.
There is a clay we're given, a reality. There are facts. There are truths. But there are so many pairs of hands, so many half-truths, so many outright lies. Reality is fragile; we tweak it and shape it into what we want to show the world. Sometimes we can make the form completely different from the content. Then the heat of the kiln, the pressure, deforms things.
Sometimes they explode.
My husband has multiple sclerosis. We concealed it, possibly breaking the law. We involved other people. We may go down hard. These things are basic truths. The woman who smiles, the one they name helicopters after -- this has not touched her yet. She's not me, exactly; she's just the office. Just the image. Just the outside.
We had a deal. And I'm not sure what I expected to come of it. I'm not sure I knew what I was asking. But it's also a basic truth that he's never broken a promise to me before.
"Form."
Function: Noun.
2. Established method of expression or proceeding, formula.
You behave yourself according to your station. When you are married to a President, you are always supportive. You are always a believer, an idealist. You are always smiling.
There are other rules and procedures we're supposed to follow; there are laws and we're not supposed to break them. Some of them are written in books, and some of them are things that should have been obvious. Like, you don't make promises you can't keep. And you don't imagine that secrets can stay secret forever. And you lock the door of your hotel room, and you don't sign pieces of paper without reading them.
Function: Noun.
3. A printed or typed document with blank spaces for insertion of required or requested information.
I wonder if I've signed away our happiness. I wonder if the smiles will ever be real again. We made a bid to keep our personal information private, to do good things for this nation. We lied to and defrauded the American people in a grab for power. Maybe both those things are true.
"Form."
Function: Verb
2. To develop, come into existence: arise.
Everything is changing and I want it to be done with. Something new is developing and I wish I'd never helped start it. I want it to be over.